Home > Chewin' the Fat > Archives > 2008 > May > 22
Thursday, May 22, 2008
I don’t have the patience …
My wife often suggests I try being more patient in certain situations, especially when we are out in public. Does this mean I need to be patient when:
Some lamebrain in front of me at a stoplight doesn’t recognize the light turned green 25 seconds ago because he or she is gabbing on the phone.
When I write a check at the grocery store only to have the clerk ask “Is your last name really Husband?” or “Husband, huh. Where’s your wife?” or “Is your wife’s last name wife?”
When we’re walking through the mall and every salesperson working at those booths try to sell me a cell-phone cover, some kind of miracle lotion for your face, elbows and feet, crocs in every color imaginable or some kind of device that plugs into your car radio and works as a phone.
When those same salespeople won’t take “No thank you,” “NO!” or the look of grave danger as a sign that maybe I have no interest in what they’re selling.
When I’m buying a pair of shoes and the guy behind the counter asks me to join his super-duper special shoe-buyers club and smirks at me when I say “no thank you,” or says “you should really consider this great deal,” as if its a winning lottery ticket when its just a scheme to benefit the store and not the customer.
When I’m the only one standing at the deli at a grocery store and there are three clerks behind the counter talking about the “rad” part they were at last night instead of helping me.
When I finally ask one of the three “rad” clerks to help me and they all give me a look as if I asked all of them to break off their arms and run them through the meat grinder.
- When my wife and I go see a movie and, of course, the other 17 people in the theater mistakes the quiet atmosphere for social hour.
Sitting at the doctor’s office for two hours only to have the doctor shine a light my ear, write me a prescription and tells me all is well.
When my mother wipes the floor with me in a game of rummy while my wife is laughing and making fun of me.
I know, patience is a virtue, blah, blah, blah. But there are limits to everything and when that line is crossed; it’s on like Donkey Kong!
Sorry honey. I’ll work on being more patient in trying times like these … except for those salespeople in the mall who can’t take no for an answer. Maybe I’ll bring some eggs with me next time…
