Home > Haute Mamas > Archives > 2008 > May > 16 > Entry
Let’s not talk about sex and pretend we did
Caution: The following entry is graphic in nature in that it deals with (whisper) s-e-x and bathroom-related bodily functions. If you find frank discussions of such things unappealing or morally unsound, you’re not alone, but you should click to somewhere else just in case.
Last weekend, Margaret, my darling, innocent, ever-polite, 7-year-old barged in on me while I was in the bathroom.
She does this quite often, plus she finds no problem with starting to disrobe on her way to the bathroom, finding no reason to actually wait until she is in the bathroom to pull down her pants.
This is irritating, to say the least, and we’ve talked to her about it more than once.
On this oh-so-horrifying day, she barged in on me and then started commenting on what she saw in the toilet:
“Why is there blood in the toilet? Are you OK? Should I call Daddy?”
It is precisely at these moments that I want to say anything other than the truth. But being that she is a moderately mature child and I want her to always feel comfortable with talking to me about anything that I decided to tell her the truth. I was having my period.
That just inspired more questions.
Gah! Why do I have to be the one who explains these things?
I explained the process of the monthly menstrual cycle about which she mistakenly understood to mean that I was pregnant.
Gah! Why can’t she just understand perfectly without the charts and diagrams already?
More explanation on my part about my period meaning that I was, indeed, not pregnant.
Of course, that was not good enough and I was forced into an awkward, albeit thankfully brief, conversation about sex.
To which Margaret replied, “Right and you haven’t had sex in a long time.”
Yep, good enough for me.
Permalink | Comments (8) | Post your comment | Categories: Robin
Comments
By Terry
May 16, 2008 7:46 AM | Link to this
LOL ! I believe that calls for a……..
lock on the bathroom door.
By Richie Ann
May 16, 2008 9:14 AM | Link to this
I think you handled the situation just fine. You answered direct questions but didn’t offer any information that she may not be ready for. As uncomfortable as it made you feel, it needed addressed. I understand girls often have their first period around 11 these days, weird and scary, but true. And Terry’s right, time to start locking the bathroom door.
By Robin
May 16, 2008 9:24 AM | Link to this
Our old house has few interior locks. We just need to teach that girl some manners and etiquette on closed doors. And then I need to start closing the door when I go to the bathroom.
By Zarah
May 16, 2008 9:36 AM | Link to this
KUDOS to you for telling her the truth even if it was hard. I believe when we lie to our kids about important things like sex & their bodily functions, we set them up for disaster and poor self images. And Margaret is lucky to have a mom who is willing to talk to her honestly. Hopefully she’ll return that when she’s older!
By Laurena
May 16, 2008 10:00 AM | Link to this
Generally, when they’re old enough to be aware enough to ask, they’re old enough for a forthright answer. I’ll never forget my 10-year-old “wait a minute …” moment when my dad’s single secretary had a baby. So much for my mom’s previous explanation that babies come from “two people fall in love, get married, and God gives them babies.” My conclusion from the secretary situation was that God had made a mistake, which opened up a whole new world of religious doubt. Thinking about it now, I hope that baby didn’t look anything like my dad!
By Lynn
May 16, 2008 10:31 AM | Link to this
Tough but necessary! Try explaining it all to a boy! Then you have to tell both sides, periods and ummm, you know, those things boys get in math class.
By Mark
May 16, 2008 10:57 AM | Link to this
What? Bad grades? Spit wads in their hair? ;-)
By schmutzie
May 30, 2008 12:38 AM | Link to this
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