Sheri Fisher columns

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Cogitating on cognizance

By Debra Dobbins
Wednesday, June 18, 2014

A synonym for “cognizant” (found in today's editorial) is “aware.” “Cognizant” is a back formation of “cognizance.” (Back formation occurs when words are clipped to create new words. Other examples are “edit” from “editor,” “baby-sit” from “baby sitter” and “handwrite” from “handwritten.” These are verbs created from nouns, while “cognizant” is an ...

Listen to your head and your heart

By Sheri Fisher
Tuesday, August 17, 2010

“A woman introduced herself after one of my seminars last month,” Dan said. “I’d seen her at the seminar series a few times before, but we had never talked. It seems she gathered some information about me, possibly from the company’s website. You know how badly I’ve wanted to meet someone. I was flattered and surprised that it finally happened.” His words sounded promising, but I sensed hesitation in his voice. “Have you seen her ...

Face parenting challenges with advice from others

By Sheri Fisher
Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Once a month, my friend Tammy and I enjoy breakfast together. We met 15 years ago when we were both pregnant for the first time. I consider Tammy (and several other friends) part of my “village.” As my children have grown, I’ve built and depended on my village and people who know what I’m going through and support me. Even though Tammy has two daughters and I have three sons, it’s good for us to swap stories. Some issues are similar and some are very ...

Ignoring emotions does not make them go away

By Sheri Fisher
Sunday, August 1, 2010

“I haven’t told anyone that I’m doing life coaching,” Michael confessed. “They’ve noticed changes in me, but I don’t think it’s anybody’s business but mine.” “Would it be bad to let someone know you are working to improve your life?” I asked. “Most people think I have my act together,” he said. “I don’t want to be seen as weak … not that life coaching makes you weak,” he ...

Aim for a level playing field in relationships

By Sheri Fisher
Tuesday, July 27, 2010

“Since I’ve been focusing on the area of my life concerning my friendships, some interesting things have been happening,” Donna said as we started her life coaching session. “What have you noticed?” I asked. “As I’ve been changing personally, my friendships have shifted as well,” Donna said. “I’ve outgrown relationships that used to mean a lot to me. As I let go of old friendships, I find new ones that fit me ...

It’s your life; be your own judge

By Sheri Fisher
Tuesday, July 20, 2010

“How are things going with Katelyn,” I asked Lisa as we started our life coaching session. Katelyn is Lisa’s 8-year-old daughter, who Lisa described as strong-willed and moody with an unending need for attention. “Yesterday we had a tough day,” Lisa said. “What happened?” I asked. “The kids played nicely all morning. When I announced that lunch was ready, Katelyn wouldn’t come inside to eat. I set out their lunches and ...

Shake off old thought patterns

By Sheri Fisher
Wednesday, July 14, 2010

“I love your necklace,” I said as we began Keri’s life coaching session. Keri beamed. “Thank you! I made it myself! I love making jewelry. It’s my new hobby and I think I have some talent,” she responded. “You’ve been talking about how empty you feel in your job,” I said. “How would it feel to find something you love AND get paid for it?” “I couldn’t make money at this,” Keri said, gesturing toward ...

People aren’t mind-readers, tell them how you feel

By Sheri Fisher
Tuesday, June 29, 2010

As Clyde walked in for our life coaching appointment, I turned my phone off so we wouldn’t be interrupted. “I get sick of those things,” Clyde said, motioning toward the phone. “The phone?” I asked. “Yes,” he said. “It seems people cannot live without them. Twenty years ago, all we had was a land line and a desktop computer. Nowadays, people have constant access to everyone and everything. I may sound like a grumpy old man, but at 72, ...

A belated tribute to the fathers in my life

By Sheri Fisher
Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Since we just celebrated Father’s Day, it seems appropriate to dedicate today’s column to the important fathers in my life. Let’s start with my dad. I have the best dad in the world and I’m not just saying that because of Father’s Day. He has been a great role model to me not only on how to raise my kids, but also on how to be respectful, balanced and loving to myself, my family, friends and community. What’s interesting about my dad is that he ...

Use an affirmation to get through a tough situation

By Sheri Fisher
Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Eric began life coaching after he and his wife of 17 years got divorced. He continued working with a counselor to deal with the emotional issues. His interest in life coaching was to rebuild his life. Eric’s emotions left him unable to deal with the basic communication necessary to effectively parent. He and his ex-wife, Joanne, communicated through e-mail, and the more impersonal, the better. This strategy worked sometimes, but frequently led to miscommunication. His action ...

Take time to step into another perspective

By Sheri Fisher
Tuesday, June 8, 2010

“Is everything set for the big day?” I asked as I started my life coaching session with Brittany. She was getting married in two weeks. “Yes, but that’s not what I’m worried about,” Brittany responded. “What are you worried about?” I asked. “It’s Katelyn, one of my bridesmaids. We were college roommates our freshman year, and we are like this,” she said, holding up crossed fingers. “Isn’t she one of ...

Rude on a scale of 1 to 10

By Sheri Fisher
Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Janice walked in the door for our coaching session, rolled her eyes and ended her phone call. “Someone important?” I said with a smile. “Yes, very,” she said. “But he can also be irritating. It was my husband, Darrel.” “Would you like to talk about what’s irritating you?” I asked, knowing that venting can be a great way to start a coaching session. By releasing this energy, the client can more easily move forward. “We ...

Taking action steps keeps life moving forward

By Sheri Fisher
Tuesday, May 25, 2010

My client, Deborah, had been married for nearly 20 years and had two children. Although she had known for more than two years that she wanted a divorce, she had only talked to Ted about it four months ago. They were in counseling, but no matter what they did to keep their marriage together, divorce seemed inevitable. Deborah sought life coaching to help her rebuild her life. She didn’t want to let life happen to her. She wanted to play an active part. With her counselor, ...

Communication key to closing relationship expectations gap

By Sheri Fisher
Tuesday, May 18, 2010

It was my first transatlantic flight. I was on my way to Germany. I planned to enjoy the long flight by reading, writing and sleeping. Talking to people was not my top priority. I was on vacation. Being a life coach, however, doesn’t just turn on and off. When someone talks to me, I usually fully engage. It’s a habit. I find it nearly impossible to half listen, especially when someone wants to talk, and a nine hour flight provides an excellent opportunity to be heard (or ...

Personal growth can bring uneasy changes to friendships

By Sheri Fisher
Tuesday, May 4, 2010

As I waited for Paige to arrive for her coaching appointment, I thought about how much personal growth she had experienced since she began being coached and committed herself to a new fitness program. Her initial goal to lose weight had grown into a complete overhaul of her fitness program, her nutritional program and her entire life. After the first two appointments with her personal trainer, Paige came into our coaching session ready to quit working out. Her body was sore and she ...

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