It’s been a blue kind of week. I hate writing when I feel like this because I can’t get around it. I’m run by my emotions. I can’t put aside the pressure on my chest. I can’t open the veil shrouding my outlook on life. I just have to let myself feel this way.
I have to think these thoughts and work through them. Trying to push aside my feelings is stupid and futile. My feelings are a not sign that I’m weak or a drama queen or anything said about people like me. My emotions are me, who I am, what makes me interesting.
But having said that, I hate reading stuff I’ve written when feeling down. I looked for anything I could post or link to instead of hashing this out. But the fact remains that I have to acknowledge how I’m feeling, put it out there, otherwise it won’t go away.
I keep trying to convince myself that it’s enough to just write this stuff and that I don’t need to publish this. Why not just show the sunny side of myself on my blog? Why not just bury this in my hard drive and be done with it?
Writing this blog is more than just putting words on a page. It’s the sharing. I prefer sharing the fun, positive side of my life, but into each life some rain must fall.