Cyber Scary

The Lickers household is finally bursting into the 20th century! Uh, make that the 21st century. We have two computers at home (sort of) but up until today no internet access, and my son does not own a cell phone. He assures me that this clearly makes him a social outcast of epic proportions. The “sort of? computer thing means we have a second CPU that his dad gave him from his technology recycling business. I have no idea why we need this second CPU. Hell, I don•t even know if they still call it a CPU! Alex has swapped out bits and pieces (no pun intended) from each computer so there’s no telling what’s in where. He’s 14 and thinks he knows everything about computers. I am substantially older than that and I know I don’t know squat about computers anymore. That’s why I’m hiring Rick Castellini to sort it all out. So, getting this internet is a big deal for both of us. It will somehow instantly elevate his social, economic, academic, financial and spiritual standing, or so it would seem. For me, it’s one more battle line to be drawn in the sand! Up to this point, I didn’t need to worry about on-line predators, porn sites, unauthorized credit card purchases, instant messaging, dangerous web sites that teach you how to make meth and bombs, or the number of hours wasted aimlessly surfing the net. I was blissfully happy that it was one issue I didn’t have to deal with. (At least not in my home. I’m not naïve enough to know he couldn’t access all this junk from a buddy’s house.) But now that my kid will be in high school he truly will need all the good stuff that comes from the internet. Like when he writes his thesis on how to finally save the whales, or why Al Gore’s Inconvenient Truth really isn’t, or how to actually Free Tibet he’ll need to use the internet for research. But in the meantime I have to worry about viruses you can catch with your clothes on and spam that doesn’t come in a can. And firewalls, whatever they are. So while Alex can hardly wait to finally be wired to the world, I have one even bigger fear. Now he can read my blog!! And post comments!! Wait! Isn’t that what parental controls are for? Hey – this could be fun after all. Now, about the cell phone . . .