Sex or Enchiladas?

So baby Three Amigo can come out anytime he wants now. There have been signs this week pointing to an early and speedy delivery, followed by aches and pains, and now all has stopped. I'd be fine with him coming right now. Okay ... now. Still nothin. So I consulted Google this morning to find out what I could do to speed things along. As we learned from the gender guessing game, these wives tales are just that, tales, but I'd be willing to try something at this point to get things rolling again just so I could get this dang hand or foot or whatever it is out of my ribcage. The number one wive's tale to induce labor, according to Google, is to have lots and lots of sex. Pregnancy is beautiful, but this giant bulging belly is in no way sexy. That is just about the very last thing I feel like doing right now. As a matter of a fact at this point I cringe whenever anybody touches me. It's enough to have someone poke poke poke from the inside all the time, I don't need anything else poking me anywhere thanks very much. There's the eat some Mexican or Indian food. Anything spicy. I'll say that this did seem to induce labor with Soren when I ate my mother-in-law's spicy Super Bowl chili. I'd be willing to try that again and have debated all day about what I could make for dinner that is spicy but my kids would still eat it. At the same time I fear the heartburn that will inevitably follow if labor doesn't start. I did find one Website who said that if your hubby made you Kraft Macaroni and Cheese with a side of A1 then I'd go into labor immediately. I have a friend who SWEARS by eggplant parmesan. Breast massage. Uh. That just sounds boring. Evening primrose oil apparently is supposed to work but you have to rub it on your cervix. Ew. Maybe my friend Tamara will just let me come down to her store and sniff all the essential oils. That actually sounds kinda fun. Pedicures-well, I did try this one last Monday and it didn't work but whomever has to hold my legs when it finally does happen is going to appreciate my pretty non-gross pink tootsies. Is it a full moon? I don't think so and I'm not willing to wait another month for one to roll back around. Jumping rope-oh hell no! Deep knee bends and walking are also highly recommended by those old wives. Actually, I am going to give this one a try because I hiked the day before I had both Soren and Jonas. I can promise a Father's Day hike will happen this weekend. And lastly, but my most favorite labor inducing wive's tale is: Have a glass of wine! Oh yeah now we're talking! But, again, I'm the queen of clean when pregnant and I don't think I could do it, except uugh, there's that foot in the ribs again ...