Goe On: At least Grammy show orchestrators aren’t trotting out Madonna
This Sunday, Feb. 12, The Recording Academy will hand out a bunch of meaningless awards, some going to artists who have no business receiving them (I’m looking at you Bruno Mars).
Yes. It’s “Music’s Biggest Night.” It’s Grammy time.
Coming in a close second to the Super Bowl, the Grammys represent the most overly-hyped, bloated telecast in the month of February. Don’t worry though, I’ve been assured that this year’s awards are certified Madonna performance free.
Maybe at one point, probably before I was born, the Grammys used to mean something. Now it just feels like the award’s value has been reduced to a promotional sticker used to pump up album sales.
Plus, how can you take seriously a music award that was never been handed out to Jimi Hendrix, Bob Marley or Diana Ross? (The Lifetime Achievement Award, aka the “Oops, Our Bad, Award” that Ross is set to receive this year and Hendrix posthumously got in 1992, is merely fool’s gold and doesn’t count.)
Because I’ve never been a staunch supporter of mediocrity, I do not recommend that you tune into the live show. Rather, I’m here to save five hours of your life by breaking down the five awards that matter.
If it means that much, you can find out who won the award for Best Improvised Jazz Solo on Monday morning.
In an earlier column I predicted Adele would clean up at the Grammys. After seeing how the categories broke down, I’m sure she will win big, picking up awards for Album of the Year and Record of the Year. Her songs “Rolling in the Deep” and “Someone Like You” are just too damn good, even for Lady Gaga to overcome.
The most wide-open race is for Best Rock Album. Nominees Jeff Beck, Foo Fighters, Kings of Leon, Red Hot Chili Peppers and Wilco are all past winners.
I’d love to see Wilco take it home for “The Whole Love,” but they’ve got no chance. It comes down to either Jeff Beck’s “Rock ‘n’ Roll Party Honoring Les Paul” or Foo Fighters “Wasting Light.” It’s ‘50s nostalgia versus alternative rock. Both albums are good in their own way, but I’ll take Foo Fighters for the win.
Best new artist is always tricky to pick. The only thing for certain here is that J. Cole has no shot.
In my mind it’s Skrillex. Nobody has had a greater impact on the direction of pop music in 2011, but whether the voters will embrace an electronic dance music DJ is still up in the air. If they lean toward a more traditional musician, then it’s Bon Iver all the way.
The only question in the Best Rap Album category is which Kanye West effort wins. He has won this category three times already and the truly excellent “My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy” will make it four.
Yeezy is H.A.M. Nobody, not even himself, can topple him this year.
If you plan on watching music’s lamest night, then good for you. Just remember to take it for what it is: a carefully scripted, bloated production that pretty much stands for everything rock ‘n’ roll used to rally against.
Me? I’ll tune in. I can’t wait to see the collaboration performance of Nicki Minaj and Jason Aldean, or whatever contrived train-wreck The Recording Academy has got planned.
Oh, I also can’t wait to see how completely wrong I am with these picks.