A belated tribute to the fathers in my life
Since we just celebrated Father’s Day, it seems appropriate to dedicate today’s column to the important fathers in my life.
Let’s start with my dad. I have the best dad in the world and I’m not just saying that because of Father’s Day.
He has been a great role model to me not only on how to raise my kids, but also on how to be respectful, balanced and loving to myself, my family, friends and community.
What’s interesting about my dad is that he had no fatherly role models growing up.
I heard my father’s touching story at the adoption ceremony last year when my husband legally adopted my three sons.
The boys’ father died the previous fall, and my husband, Tom, decided to legally fulfill this very important role. I’ll tell you more about their biological father in a minute.
After the legal part of the adoption was complete, my dad led a private ceremony at our home where more than 50 friends joined us to mark the important day.
Dad called my three teenage sons up and told them a story about the importance of a father. He described how he felt growing up not truly having a father figure.
Dad’s dad died when Dad was just 8 years old. Just previous to his father’s death, my dad and his younger sister were living in an orphanage because their parents divorced and neither was sure who wanted the kids.
In the coming years, Dad had two stepfathers, but he never considered either of them to be his dad. He and his sister were just part of the package of marrying his mother, he said
Dad’s voice cracked slightly as he told of how his father died after picking up him and his sister from the orphanage on Christmas Eve, promising them the “best Christmas ever.”
Ironically and sadly, my grandfather’s death notice is dated Dec. 25.
When I hear emotion in Dad’s voice, it really gets me. The adoption was so personal to him.
As I looked around, I saw friends and family with tears in their eyes. The emotion emphasized the importance of this event.
This brings me to another important father in my life, my husband, Tom. He was in his mid-30s when we got married and he came into the boys’ lives.
Raising kids is rarely easy, and raising boys can be downright challenging. Yet, Tom has stuck with it.
Is it his upbringing or his Army training that helps him? Perhaps.
Whatever it is, this man was meant to be a father to these boys. They will be better men because of Tom’s influence.
The boys’ biological father tragically died less than two years ago. I am still sad when I think about the loss — for me, the boys and their dad’s family.
There are times when I see resemblance of their dad in their facial expressions, in the way they stand and in the things they say. His memory lives on in these boys, and I am grateful he was their father.
As I wipe away my tears and close this column, it’s easy for me to see why Father’s Day is so important. It helps me acknowledge the wonderful fathers who have blessed my life.
Sheri Fisher is an intuitive life coach living in Grand Junction. The situations and characters in her column are fictional to maintain client confidentiality. For information and to access her blog, go to http://www.coachwithsheri.com.